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Tell 'em like it is, Joe. [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

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(no subject) [Sep. 24th, 2011|01:20 pm]
RIP Maury. You liberated France, studied archery, chess, Spanish and mathematics, made your own wine, and built your own tools. You were a bad-ass motherfucker. http://www.registerguard.com/web/newslocalnews/26904696-41/sept-died-eugene-springfield-grandchildren.html.csp
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(no subject) [Jul. 22nd, 2011|04:38 pm]
Good rock 'n' roll... [long pause] I don't know. I guess it's just something that makes you feel alive. It's just like, it's something that's human, and I think that most music today isn't. And it's like anything that I would want to listen to is made my human beings instead of computers and machines. To me, good rock 'n' roll also encompasses other things, like Hank Williams and Charlie Mingus and a lot of things that aren't strictly defined as rock ‘n' roll. Rock 'n' roll is like an attitude, it's not a musical form of a strict sort. It's a way of doing things, of approaching things. Like anything can be rock 'n' roll. -Lester Bangs
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(no subject) [May. 5th, 2011|11:07 pm]
If you ever find yourself wondering, as many of you no doubt find yourselves wondering, "What the hell is wrong with Cody?" simply look at this photo, pretend there is a maddening 45-mph wind ringing in your ears, and imagine this image and that sound superimposed on everything you see and hear, pretty much all the time.

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(no subject) [Feb. 18th, 2011|02:48 pm]
Top reasons why I dislike mac fanatics more than Christians

Christians mostly just gather once a week to to talk up their choices. Mac users do it pretty much everywhere and pretty much constantly.

Christians only spend 10% of their income on their pet folly. Have you priced a mac lately? It's hard to see how a $3000 machine is less than 10% of an unemployed musician's income.

Christians will generally leave agnostics alone, but a mac fan believes everyone who isn't a macfan is automatically a Windows fan. This is a textbook Either-Or fallacy. BTW, Fuck Linux.

Christians believe their manual to be written by a magic man in the sky, but mac fans believe their magic man is so all-powerful, you don't need a manual to receive his blessings.

Christians do burn, but they don't generally ignite on their own.

Christians like to pretend they are a persecuted minority, but mac users like to pretend they are avant-garde.

I've never heard a Christian talk up BSD without knowing what it stands for.

When a Christian needs a part replaced, they use the same parts as everyone else.

You can play lots more games with an Christian than with a mac.

Christians aren't preventing you from making nuclear weapons.
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Caution: Rant ahead. [Dec. 29th, 2010|05:03 pm]
The worst part of working in I.T. is not people who know nothing. After all, beyond the gas pedal and the steering wheel, Joe Sixpack knows nothing about cars and that's fine - he's a drunk guy in Sales anyway.

The worst part of working in I.T. is the guy (every company has one) building and selling computers. His customers ask me for help. Then he comes and asks me for an iMac adapter. Do I look like a macfag? Do you see a single mac in this business?

Conversationally, I tell him that PCs break a little each day, and that Macs only break in large ways. He says he loves his mac at home. I wonder why nobody ever just 'likes' their mac. They love them. Here's a quote from the internet:

"This the iMac I know and love, a perfect machine that is easy to use and stress-free." - Gayerson McMacfag, Esq.

Never mind that loving a perfect machine is like loving a perfect person: You are deluded and they are probably fucking the gardener.

Then this guy, This Fucking Guy, asks me if I've ever worked on a mac. Only since os8, but then again I 'work' on silicone machines and can't even fathom 'loving' them. I hate Macs now and I hated them in 1997. I've seen their motherboards fail in ultra-faggy ways that make them continue to run, but freeze hourly, randomly, maddeningly. There's also the fact that Apple is a hardware company and they don't allow any other manufacturers to license their hardware, so if a component fails, dig deep into your pockets, because you're not done paying.

In all honesty, Macs have gotten better over the years and I've never really hated them. They are slick and fast and so long as you only want to do what it wants to let you to do, it's smooth sailing. However, the users of Macs have only gotten worse, if only because there are more of them, proud to pay exorbitant rates for a machine that fetishizes the fascism of perfect ease and comfort. Or, as a dead man wrote, 'a cybernetic ecology where we are free of our labors, and all watched over by machines of loving grace.'

tl;dr: Fuck you, Steve Jobs.
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Bishop's take on the current state of cinema in America [Nov. 7th, 2010|10:16 pm]
Who needs originality and creativity! Especially when you know that you have a captive audience of reprobates from the cultural backwoods of America who are willing to shell out their lazily earned bucks to have Hollywood rub a quick one out on their faces just so they can forget about who they really are inside for an hour and thirty minutes.
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(no subject) [Nov. 7th, 2010|05:38 pm]
Best quote from this trip home:

"I quit meth, but I can't quit cigarettes.
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(no subject) [Aug. 18th, 2010|09:46 am]
The world breaks everyone, and afterward,
some are strong at the broken places.
- Hemingway
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What do you call [Aug. 1st, 2010|01:31 pm]
...the useless skin around a vagina?

Edward Cullen.

This concludes the misogynist joke hour.
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fassbook [Jul. 13th, 2010|10:50 am]
I'm sick of internet 2.0. I want internet 1.0, or maybe even 0.4a. Too many normal people are on this fancy new internet what with pictures and virtual farms and what-all. Too many people I went to grade school with. News, buddy: I didn't like you then and I don't like you now.

So, look out for my misanthropic rants here instead!
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